September 9, 2011

Sharing my Reality - not a Story

Why now?  Why talk now?  Everyone has their time that they decide to break their silence no matter what the matter is.  Whether it be alcoholism, gambling, infidelity, disease, illness, tragedy, trauma, pregnancy, fetish, fantasy, mistakes, dreams, wishes or like in my case sexual abuse; it feels how it feels for that individual and it is truly unique to only them.  Yes, all these topics may be common or uncommon to some and in some way may relate, but no two people will experience sharing all the details, the shameful, the disgusting, the sad and the guilt ridden feelings the same. 

My posts are real for me, true and factual and are my memories and mine alone.  I am in the infancy of exposing my childhood horrors.  Horrific events to me, but you reading may have something even worse that may have happened to you.  I admit I'm even guilty of thinking another person's reality was nothing compared to my own.  In the same light,  I also have minimized my own childhood sexual abuse (CSA) that his or her trauma was so much worse than mine.

I encourage each follower to support me and give me strength by leaving your comments.  I am a caring person.  No one ever deserves any harm to come to them, nor should I make excuses for his behavior.  It may be slow going for me to expose myself.  That's how I feel.  Exposed.  Raw.  Please stick with me, I have promised myself that I will NOT bury me at the back of my mind's closet again.  No.  I WILL clean and clean until there are no more secrets in my mind.  I am in therapy and have only been for a short time not related to my CSA, but it did come out of me - I couldn't believe I had let the secret escape my lips.  It is MY time.

The Keyhole to My Mind's Closet

The Keyhole to My Mind's Closet
Blogging = cleaning = healing.